Sleep

Ahhhh.
Sleep.
Great concept: One third of your life should be spent enjoying sleep. Deep sleeps.

My version? Several-Times interrupted, never eight hours, wake-up-feeling-worse-than-when-I-feel-asleep--sleep.

So is this why, about once a month, I sleep for about 30 hours on Friday and Saturday night?

Really, it is like clock work.

"Hey girl!! I'm coming home!! Hollah!" a BFF will text. "Get ready to par-tay!"

oh wait, Waaiiitttttttttt, I'm asleep already. It's 7:00pm and I'm out.

"WAKE THE FUCK UP" "WTF ARE YOU DOING DEE" "WE ARE OUT DOWNTOWN? WHERE ARE YOU?" "STOP DOING YOUR BOYFRIEND AND CALL ME" "HELLLLLO!!" "OK WE'RE COMING OVER TO ROLL YOU OFF THAT FUCKING BED."

Sometimes that last one works. But really. These are the texts I'll see the NEXT day, and I'm truly flabbergasted as to how I slept through that?

Ask anyone: I can hear my phone's 'text-noise' from across a mall. So how is it on 'these weekends' can I not hear anything?

People never want to believe me, til they've witnessed the 'Dee sleep' themselves. Now all my close friends just know, I probably passed out.

See, for most, the weekend is a time to go all-out, fucking riot style party! WHOO!!

For me, my job is so stressful, it's DeeTime. Get away from me time. I'm taking hot baths, making new hot tea or coffee every 3 hours, seeing my puppies, having a bottle Cambria Pinot and watching lame movies all night time. And, on occasion, NOT sleeping all week, and having some party weekends, will catch up to me. (or having such a redic Thursday night party, it's just warranted: see yesterday's post: "Why drink shots before the cocktails?")

... And Thus: The all sleep weekend.

A few things contribute here:
#1 I like partying when no one else does: Tuesday, I'm all over it
#2 Early morning meetings? Helps me wake up sooner if I was up late the night before. My fear of over sleeping gets me up at 5:30
#3 I sleep like shit every night of the week
..most important...
#4 I GET OFF WORK AT 5PM AT THE EARLIEST, AND IN NO WAY CAN I GET HOME AT 6PM AFTER DOWNTOWN TRAFFIC, EAT DINNER BY 8PM AND BE ASLEEP AT TEN.
My body just doesn't do that!! I need like a 7 hour down-time. Therefore, I watch movies til 12:30, and therefore wake up ALWAYS running behind, and am stressed all day, etc...

Suck!

"So Dee, just go to bed sooner, wake up earlier, problem solved!"

"NO!" I say to this person, and everyone else that gives me that line of shit. Maybe if I got off work at 3:30pm, that MAY work, but I don't. I NEED ALOT OF DOWNTIME. Regardless.

So basically I'm fucked.

I guess once a month, my friends, my boyfriends, and my family will just have to understand I'm out of commission. I mean everyone's different. Every needs to tend to their body's cycle of needs.

LASTLY: SLEEP IS RELATIVE. YOU ARE NOT LAZY IF YOU GET UP AT 1PM. MAYBE YOUR WORK SCHEDULE OR SOCIAL SCHEDULE CONSTITUTES GOING TO BED LATE AND GETTING UP LATE!

So why the fuck do people always consider getting up at noon crazy? What, because the 'early bird catches the worm?"

Sure if your worm closes at 10am and you need to catch it early. What if the worm I had to catch was a 1pm meeting that included Bloody Mary's and Hoagies. Hm?

To each their own muthah f-ahs. To each their own....

:)

In the meantime, I'm fully rested. Just wishing I hadn't pissed off a dear friend. Love you K.

Hope you see your Texas hair soon.

D