"THIS IS NOT MY SIZE ASSHOLE!!" Shopping Fun!

No, those are the right brands or designers... but you get the point.

Mama shopped on Saturday!!

So, it started off with an idea for a sweet evening: 15 local high-end boutiques were having a "cash n carry clearance" near a prominent boardwalk. If you shipped the special "invite only evening party" and paid $10 for charity, you may just get that last pair of GoldSign jeans for $40. Who knows. Maybe go for a little cocktail in Clayton afterward, invite some girlfriends and some gayfriends... Simple, innocent, fun!

As the day came, no one wanted to go shopping :*(

So we all go the next morning, and was it the fresh air, the 50 degree temps, the "did I awake in LA?" mood... who knows. But the $200 I took out for this "I'll only spend $50 at that sale" was completely gone in like 45 minutes. It was like a pricey yard sale. I got some SWEET things tho:

I calculated, I got $800 of stuff for $190. Yay!

Now, enter the scavenger hunt: NO NO NO not with goods,... with my friends that arrived later that I trying to keep up to Nick and I. So we leave the sale after having a parking lot show for Amanda and C; we looked like we were selling bad fake fendis out of Amanda's sweet new Jeep. Congrats you!

Amber and Joshy Poo are even more behind them. She claims it's because I texted them last minute that we were going-- really tho I thought Amber was already at the mall because it was a Saturday....;) Love ya lady! No but really, it was sweet that everyone was coming out for an afternoon of fun.

So then we all hit up the near by mall for a purse and shoe extravaganze at Dillard's, and DAMMIT!! I found some awesome, plaid and patent type BCBG shoes for like $40! Then... the boots. THE BOOTS THAT MADE A GAY MAN CRINGE: Normally you shouldn't buy that shit then. But I liked them dammit!! They were $52 from $298!! Of course bitch picked up that shit. YAY! I wore them today. Totally cute. Bitches.

So aside from two new dress shirts, and some MAC fun, we hadddd to be done.

Oh waittttttttttttt, nope. We are heading for the notorious STL Loop. Into Brandt's we go. I fucking LOVE that place! We did have a VERY charismatic server, we'll call her Meow. Meow loves her glasses. Meow told us about her glasses, and her dad's eye care insurance, and her favorite frames designers for about 15 minutes all because Nick complimented her frames. wowy. Great service tho.

We had a light lunch: World's biggest salads for real. Here Amanda, C, really, please, have some lettuce. Nick takes one for the team and orders the first alcoholic beverage of the day (Thank you Nick--granted beau had been with 3 "ladies" all day.. probably pretty tired of the shop thing)
So vodka Dee ordered. Mmm this salad's better. Enter, Amanda and C's crab cakes: the normally smallish cake delights were half-pound patty size. We give the server the ole "WTF but thank you" face. "Oh, you know, they messed up. Enjoy!" Amanda says it looks like cat food. Score one for Dee! YAY crab cake! Best in the city seriously.

....This was slowly becoming one of the happiest days of my life.

So, feeling full of yummy food and vodka, and having $.10 left to shop with, we do some power clearance shopping at a shop I used to work at.

OMG. Look at that dress. Holy Fuckstick. What a sweet "Vicky Beckham wanna be and my boobies would look spectacular" dress. Ouch, $240. "Oh, I'll give you 70% off" says the girl as she sees my drool, picks my up off the floor and scoots me into the dressing room. "It's a little busty... so you know.... that's why it's on clearance" warns the sales women.

'I've got this shit' I think. No wait, WAIT, WAITTT. Holy shit I'm stuck. Was it the one vodka that did this to me?? DAMN YOU VODKA! How did I not see that I didn't unzip the side zipper all the way. Either way, here comes Maternal Miss our sales rep. Oh theres a boobie. Oh there's my fat ass looking out the fitting room door. "Sorry ya'll. Sorry about the bootie. Amanda come help me!! GET OUT MA'AM!" So Amanda helped me yank that shit over my head. Size 6 my ass. Or maybe it was a "size 6 for no tits" and bitch told me it would fit. God sales people are crazy. Do you see these shelves?? No way. Any way, I found a nice navy wrap dress for like $20 that fit my girls and my tush just fine, and we were outtie.

That was enough. We all laughed the rest of our walk, and my charming PERFECT manfriend had to twist it, "That just made my day."

Ok manfriend,... I did have you watch me shop all day. I'll give you a get out of jail free card. >:(

Great day tho. Thanks everyone for making it one of those Saturdays.

Oh yeah, and yes, we did finally see Amber and Josh 3 hours later on the street. Good to see you too. Jk babe, loved your sweater. :)

D